Headache and a half

Ever get the feeling your head is being slowly squeezed by something wet and cold? No? Lucky you.
Why do I have a head ache?
1- I've not been for a run for a couple of days and my endorphin thingies musn't be doing what they're supposed to.
2- I realised at around 5 in Newcastle that I hadn't eaten any lunch so popped into Marks and Spencer and had some over seasoned chicken that's making me feel ick.
3- And balancing is something I suck at, there are some people int he world who can spin plates, juggle, whatever kind of circus metaphor you'd like but I'm not one of them. Focussing one one task is one of the only things I can do sufficiently.
4- I've lost the tiniest bit of weight so my trousers don't fit so well and I've been walking round with a piece of blue wool holding them up.

I'm not a migraine sufferer, I rarely get headachey but when I do it's nearly always a cold or dehydration, this time, two in one go. Lucky girl, eh?
But I have something to look forward to. Tomorrow I'll be at Bill Quay farm, a fine community farm, selling glass and ceramics at their farmers market. It may be perverse, but I'm well and truly excited, I'll be spending the day with wonderful students and all chilly and autumnal and lovely!
I will be bringing some cash just for hot chocolate and a well worn set of thermals so it should be lovely.



The year group are getting closer to raising all the money we need and I'm incredibly glad for an opportunity to fundraise using our actual trade as opposed to bake sales. Although I'm baking this, this and some mystery stuff from Sweet Paul magazine for Monday mornings Art History lectures too, let's see how that turns out.
Time to take some paracetamol and drink my body weight in water.
TL

Big Man

So, my week is now divided into tasks. Monday is research day, Tuesday is modelling, Wednesday is feedback, Thursday is dissertation and Friday is degree show work. Only thing is, this week I've been making this fella. And may have neglected my other jobs. Whoops!
TL

Fundraising

Anyone in Sunderland should come and visit us in the beautiful Ashburn art building which is about to be abandoned by the University of Sunderland for somewhere with air conditioning, heating and other practial but dull things. So this might be your last chance, come along, eat a cookie, buy some awesome awesome ceramics and glass.
TL

Missing things

I'm in the library and never have I sniffed more in a quieter place. I have my first cold of the winter, and it's probably just about the right time to have it. I'm busier than I can remember ever being. So much so that on Tuesday, I bought a diary. And a-wooosh, I'm full of feeling organised and amazing.

Only trouble is, I keep missing things. More precisely, phone calls. My phone is on its last legs and I need a new one, I admit it, I bow to defeat. So far, I've missed calls for a job interview and to get a table at Tynemouth market, so all my feelings of having everything in control are ebbing away, slowly and sadly.

So far I've been in every phone shop I can think of and have grown the cajones to ask idiotic questions like 'what's 3G?' and other things I'm sure you'd hear 80 year old luddites ask a tech savvy young man in a phone store. Problem is, I'm a potter. I know that the idea that we all live in wooden huts and bake our own bread is outdated, but not by much. I still have a cheat sheet to programme a kiln and lets face it, this blog isn't as pretty as it should be, it should be champagne and instead, it's Lambrini.

But my phone is a necessity, I text about a million times a day, mostly to my team of glass and ceramics fundraisers about things I need to do/have forgotten to do/need them to do pretty please. And it's difficult to organise things just via email, because grown ups are in charge of things, and some grown ups would rather do things voice to voice rather than email to email. This means I have to continue to brave terrifying jargon (what's a mega pixel, and how many do I want?) in order to have my megalomaniacal feelings placated.

Mini-deadline tomorrow, must dash. But lets all celebrate the joy that is a flow chart for one moment.

From the brilliant 344 questions that anyone can feel free to buy me.

The List

Have you seen the irritating advert for the new irritating Sarah Jessica Parker film? She mentions that at 2 am she goes through 'the list' in her head? It's irritating because it's such a generic thing that everyone does that it's barely even observational. But here I am, with the list rolling through my head.

I wrote a massive list whilst I was in a lecture the other day (I'm committed, I just love lists too much) and now I've lost the damn thing. And I don't think I did it accidentally. I think I did it in the same way I sometimes 'accidentally' sleep late or 'accidentally' forget I'm on a diet. If I really wanted too, I could find it. But I don't want to look at it, it's too huge and scary.

We went through the brief for our final major project the other day. It's a map of what the next 8-9 months look like. When it was over someone said 'Ooh, Lily, you've got some greys' I'm 22 people! And I'm pretty sure I didn't have grey hair at the beginning of that lecture, but knowing how much work I'm going to have to churn out hurts. Physically, hurts.

More than that, I like to do well. I'm not a perfectionist, but I'm an only child and I used to be in amateur dramatics, I like praise. And knowing how much work there is made me have a minor panic attack. I just felt like I couldn't do it. I cracked a whole bunch of jokes to try and hide it but denying that I'm freaking out about writing a dissertation whilst getting technical notes done and organising a degree show and trip to New Designers, well, the air began to feel like treacle and the lecturers started to look at me like I was turning blue.

Then I made my list. Because order can spring unexpectedly from chaos, mountains can turn to mole hills at the swipe of a pen and I felt better. University is tough, and I'd forgotten. I have a blast with all the amazing people who inspire me so it's easy to miss that there's often huge piles of work that keep you awake at night.

I'm talking to a bunch of second years on monday about being second years and organising their exhibition. I hope I can help them feel as empowered as the 3rd years made me feel and that they have a blast. I started back at uni on Monday and I'm already feeling nervous and sad about leaving. I may not always have felt comfortable or happy there and I certainly haven't always done the right thing but the last two years have been so amazing I just have to remember to keep going forwards. I should put that on the list...